Biblical worldview “Refocus Day” tackles challenge of promoting God’s design for family

The first presentation of the day was by Anthea Nagoor of Focus on the Family Africa.

Ryan Smit programme director of the Wilberforce Academy South Africa (WA SA) reports on the latest development in their journey to equip believers to live out a biblical worldview where they are

The Wilberforce Academy South Africa (WA SA) hosted its second Refocus Day for 2023 on Juy 28 and 29. The event was held at four physical venues — in Pietermaritzburg (KwaZulu-Natal), Somerset West (Western Cape), Potchefstroom (North West) and Randburg (Gauteng) — as well as online for those who could not be there in person. On the Friday night Focus on the Family screened the documentary, Irreplaceable, and Saturday was a full day of speakers and key engagements. Just over 60 delegates attended.

Every January WA SA hosts an intensive, structured residential week aimed at equipping Christians to stand for Christ in public life. In addition to receiving training in the practical application of a biblical worldview, delegates are plugged into a diverse community of Kingdom-minded faculty members and peers – all focused on impacting our nation for Christ. More details about the academy are available on the website: https://wilberforceacademy.org.za/

Ben Schoeman breaking down the impact phases of a child’s life and key role players in each.

Families matter

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Anthea Nagoor, director of counselling at Focus on the Family Africa for the past six years, presented first on the topic of “What is Family?” She shared statistics and gave an overview of the current state of families in South Africa – including the prevalence of two-parent households, the latest marriage rates, and more. According to Anthea, South Africa has the lowest rates in all categories compared to countries like the USA, Nigeria, Spain, China, Mexico, Egypt and the UK. Our marriage rate sits at just 25%.

This is a sad reality to acknowledge as Anthea’s words ring true: “The greatest masterpiece which God has created is family” (Genesis 1:27-28). WA SA echoes her closing statement: “Every family can be a masterpiece of God’s creation.” As the Church, we have much work to do in promoting this vital societal and creational institution.

Impact phases of a child’s life

The second session was an interview of Ben Schoeman, who works with The World Needs a Father (TWNAF) in South Africa by Ryan Smit executive director at Cause for Justice and programme director of WA SA.

TWNAF’s heart is “Helping fathers to lead their families and bring Heaven home”.

Ben unpacked the need for moms and dads to understand the significant impact phases in the development of a child – and the role each parent has to play in each phase. He explained how the absence of active parenting in each phase can negatively impact a child for life. SA is known to have a very high rate of fatherlessness – not just because fathers are absent physically, but because many are emotionally and mentally absent too, leaving the “child raising” to women. The significant role fathers play in the lives of their children is sadly often only recognised when the impact of an absent father has run its course.

Ben’s closing challenge was: “How do you, as a parent or guardian, intentionally create a life and work plan through the years that aligns with the key roles that children need present at every impact phase of their development?” Planning work and life flows, through your child’s life stages should be an intentional activity, not something left to chance.

The interview can be viewed here: https://youtu.be/tbhAZuI9yfE

WA SA delegates in Gauteng.

Social fathers

The final morning presenter was Nkosinathi Sixabayi, a pastor and the church lead for Heartlines’ Fathers Matter project. He mobilises communities and churches towards the journey of men taking ownership, responsibility and actively participating in raising their children.

Over 65% of children in SA grow up without their fathers. Nkosinathi unpacked some of the barriers that hinder fathers from being present in their children’s lives. Barriers inlude low marriage rates, unemployment resulting in migration, knowledge and skills gap, lack of provision and resources and cultural practices.

He encouraged delegates to recognise the gap they are able to step into. “You can be a father and not be active in the lives of children. Many fathers are absent – but it doesn’t take away the need for the positive presence of men in the lives of children. ‘Social fathers’ can make such a massive impact. This is where the Church comes in – it is one of the only platforms that can create healthy fathers and grandfathers,” he said.

Nkosinathi shared a WhatsApp number (060 058 2107) for anyone who wants to reach out with questions or concerns about fathering. He concluded: “You’re never too old and you’re never too young to be a good father.” We couldn’t agree more!

Encouragement through personal stories

The afternoon session was an inspiring time set aside to hear various heart stories and then praying for one another’s families at each location. One speaker shared a story of their adoption journey as parents and how God opened doors, provided finances and brought confirmation at each step. For many unborn children, adoption is the difference between life and death. The speaker’s call rang true: “We have a responsibility to life. Life is precious.”

Another shared the stories of how God moved him and his family out of the city and onto a farm, and the people they have since welcomed into their family and who have found refuge in their home. “If the nuclear family is saved, those who are in need can come in – the family is solid and can grow and expand by taking in those in need of a family.” Echoing the morning presentations, he emphasised: “There are ways to work and do life without sacrificing the next generation.”

Delegates also heard of a journey of taking a public stand for biblical family values — even to the point where legal matters become involved. “Ordinary Christian parents can make an impact just by doing the right thing,” said a delegate. A father also shared about a conversation he had with his four-year-old daughter and how he was able to help her clarify some confusing thoughts about being a boy or a girl. The truth spoken clearly, in love and with wisdom, is powerful – parents and guardians, now more than ever, need to be equipped in the knowledge of biblical truth and how to share it with their children and those around them.

Big smiles at the end of the Refocus Day from delegates in Pietermaritzburg.

In his final charge, the Apostle Paul impressed upon Timothy: “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.” — 2 Timothy 3:16, 17

We, as the church in South Africa, have an important role to play in living out and promoting God’s design. He created families and He created us to thrive and grow within the safety and nurturing of a healthy family. We need to intentionally take a stand, be unashamed, and build a society that values family – in God’s design.

Integral to this is to say to fathers “You matter!” | And to say to society: “Fathers’ matter!”

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