[notice]A monthly column in which KWAKANYA NDLELENI shares testimonies of young people who are radical for Jesus.[/notice]
“Before you keep reading this I’d like for you to take a moment to pray that God gives you a reason each new day to hold on to Him and His goodness.”
“I never knew who God was until about 2 and a half months back, and the journey has been amazing. I feel privileged to know who God is and I believe with all my heart that I am called to be His child and there is no doubting it, neither turning back nor denying it.
My name is Tiyani Ndlovu, I’m set apart, transformed and redeemed and this is my testimony. Deep down I knew I was special but I wondered and wondered to find out what it is about me that was so different. So instead of seeking God and asking Him, what was so special about me, I looked to the world for answers. The world seemed so interesting with no worry, no care you could just do what you wanted to do.
Inside of me I was harbouring so many afflictions such as rejection, lust, anger and unforgiveness. These afflictions led my life and for me to sustain them I had to feed them with more pain, and I found myself looking for love in all the wrong places — all because my father decided that one day he no longer needed his family. In my mind I thought I could make a man love me with my body and with all my heart. In reality when I gave up the one thing that God regards as so precious and a temple of His dwelling, I found myself getting hurt over and over again. Each hurt taking a piece of me leaving me empty and I almost believed that this was how my life was supposed to be.
Until one day, God reached out His hand, touched me with grace and said that I was enough for Him. That day I cried because despite me hurting myself, believing that I was not worthy, He still loved me. God saw me worthy, saw me beautiful and saw me so holy. I can’t even begin to tell you about His goodness because it is so beautiful. I’m reminded by the scripture Matthew 11:28-30 Then Jesus said “come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light”. Scripture alone possesses so much power but this one lays it so easily that God came for me, the broken, and all He says is come to me and I will give you rest. The day I said yes to Him, I’ve been resting and experienced His joy, I forgave myself and all those who hurt me, with that I easily accepted God’s forgiveness. Think of it like this God (Spirit), chose to come down to Earth as a man, like us but perfect and dying for us because He loves us that much: Romans 5:8 God showed His great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners. The thought of someone dying for me, I can’t comprehend and for that I give God my life, my heart, my soul, my mind and my strength. Luke 10:27 You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your strength and all your mind.
One thing I can say is that I’m so glad that all my struggles, trials, battles happened to me because I wouldn’t have known God like I know Him now and I have seen God’s glory in my life. His love is better than life, better than any other earthly love I’ve ever experienced and every day He finds a beautiful reason for me to fall deeper and deeper in love with Him.
I don’t know who you are or what you are going through but one thing I know is that God is faithful. His love does not change, it’s everlasting. Whether you are deep in the world, wondering who you are and what your purpose is in this world or you know God and His goodness, all I can tell you is that God loves you so much, unconditionally and will never leave nor forsake you even in your worst times.
God Bless you.