Couple answer God’s call to become family of nomads

Neziswa Kanju reports and reflects on a SA couple’s testimony of making a radical lifestyle change that puts family above possessions.

Eastern Cape-born, Darren and Rouchelle Peens, a husband and wife music duo known as Digby and the Lullaby are travelling throughout the country living out their South African nomadic adventure with their children.

They met through their shared love of music. Rouchelle relates the story: “We met at a studio in PE, a radio station [Kingfisher FM]. Darren’s studio was in the same radio station. I entered a song into a competition and my husband was one of the judges.”

The couple’s unique, quirky, stage name comes from their great friend Mike Broderick (the legendary South African lighting designer) who suggested Soldier and the Lullaby as a name. Darren’s second name is Digby, so they chose “Digby and the Lullaby”.

The decision to sell their possessions and live a more minimalistic lifestyle on the road was reached after prayer, during which God spoke to both of them about becoming nomads. 

“We were missing each other and we needed to figure out a way we could spend more time together. We could not stop dreaming of a way we could spend our days together; travelling like we used to when we were musicians on the road. We were both having a quiet time and this word “nomad” dropped into my spirit. Darren started speaking to me about being a nomad. No home, no possessions.

“[After heeding God’s call] We discovered South Africa for ourselves, and, in the process, discovered ourselves as a family! With no house and no possessions, all we needed was a car and five suitcases to make memories together that will stay with us forever. It’s been cathartic. We removed what was cluttering us emotionally, spiritually and physically and we found ourselves again.”

Rouchelle says their before lifestyle change, the daily grind of normal life made them grow apart as a couple and a family. “We reached a point where we’d had enough of the routine of daily life. That’s when we made the decision to sell and give away most of our belongings, opting for a nomadic lifestyle.

“If you are grinding all the time to fill your cup but you never fill your cup then something needs to change. Sometimes if you want something perfect you have to strip at a lot of things away. We stripped away our lives and we are allowing God to put in what He wants. 

A new life focused on what we value

“We purchased an old Jurgens caravan and hit the road with no worries. A new life began for us –one focused on what we truly value: spending time with our kids and having the space to be creative again. We had to form our own way because we didn’t have a blueprint from anyone else we kno who has done this.

“There is so much adventure that lies beyond your comfort zone. We are adaptable as human beings; we are so adaptable. Sometimes, you just have to have the faith and step out into something. Our number one goal is to give our children their dream childhood and hopefully our grandkids one day will benefit.”

The decision to lead a nomadic lifestyle was not easily received by the couple’s family and friends who thought it was reckless and “what would it mean to have young children in the back of a car for weeks on end?”

They needn’t have worried. Judging from the videos that Darrne and Rocuchelle regularly upload on their YouTube channel, Digby and the Lullaby, the children are indeed living a childhood dream.

Beekman Holidays, a family-oriented company, has joined the couple as a partner, offering to host the family in their different resorts across the country for four months. These resorts are family focused with exciting activities to choose from giving Darren and Rouchelle ample opportunities to create cherished memories for their young family. “We get to spend every minute of the day with our children. horse riding, pillow jumping, movie watching, trail finding just embracing our lives together as a family,” shares Rouchelle.

Their dream is to inspire South Africans to travel and be more family oriented and to embrace a more minimalistic lifestyle free from the chains of material obsession. “Our hearts lean towards families in South Africa. We would love to change the way families in South Africa view travel and maybe the way they spend their money. 

“So, instead of spending their money on material stuff, rather take the kids on holiday and go be together as a family, connect and make memories. There needs to be a focus on family. We need to keep the focus on family and healthy family units. We want to show what that looks like and this is one of the reasons we love filming our time at these resorts. They are such family oriented resorts, often we see grannies and grandpas travelling together with the children and the grandchildren. Would love to see that even more in this country”

My thoughts and observations

After speaking to Rouchelle I got to thinking about how a couple can easily lose themselves in pursuit of a progressive lifestyle that involves lots of travelling and long hours at work. These lifestyles often alienate the very people they say they are working hard for. The obsession to keep up with the Joneses has caused many to drift apart after many fights about money and a lack of intimacy because they are too exhausted to enjoy family life.

Darren and Rouchelle’s ethos is that people should live more family-centred lifestyles focused on creating more time with their spouses and children. 

Recently I came across a post where a divorce lawyer showed his long list of cases. My heart broke when I saw it and it made me wonder why the divorce rate is so high, even among Christians. I can’t help but think that the fast-paced, never ending chase for more and wanting to be better than. the hustling lifestyle that this generation has adopted, is contributing to why marriages fail. No one gets married with the intention to divorce. Divorce leaves a trail of broken dreams and broken families. It leaves children who struggle with self esteem and possible depression.

If there is indeed a way we can remedy this situation and decrease the divorce rate as a Church. shouldn’t we then be more intentional about creating a lifestyle that is more family focused. The enemy is attacking the marriage and family structure. We only have to look at the news with high incidents of domestic violence, of rebellious children to know that something is terribly wrong. The solution might be to live more family-centred lifestyles like the Peens family. 

Family is a building block to healthy communities and a great country. Part of that unity starts at home with healthy marriages and families. As we approach April 27 and commemorate 30 years of a democratic South Africa, as citizens we can agree that there is work to be done to build our nation. We cannot do that if we do not stand united.

Rouchelle says,:“The people  that are in this land they make up our BEAUTIFUL colourful FLAG and I think it’s time that we take stock of what we have and appreciate what we have maybe see it through God’s eyes. Our love for our land. We need to dream a little. Dream about the country we want and really appreciate what we have because sometimes we can fall into a pattern of not being grateful.”

What Darren and Rouchelle teach us is that when you trust God with your all and when you are prepared to lose it all. is when you can find what you are looking for. The Bible says in Mark 10:29-31; “Truly I tell you,” Jesus replied, “no one who has left home or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields for me and the gospel will fail to receive a hundred times as much in this present age: homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children and fields — along with persecutions — and in the age to come eternal life. But many who are first will be last, and the last first.”

The intentionality that they give to their marriage and family life has yielded positive results. Rouchelle says: “We are still madly in love, even after almost 12 years of marriage. We love raising kids together, doing life doing business together, networking together and performing together. We want to share God’s love and his heart for family together. That’s our mission.” Darryl and Rouchelle have achieved this because they were intentional and because they listened to God. “We felt our lives being out of balance so we followed His voice”

Their Christian roots

Their love for God stems from their childhood. Both became Christians when they were very young. Rouchelle was born and raised in a Christian family in Kariega (Uitenhage). Darren grew up in St Francis Bay, spending part of his childhood in Durban. 

Rouchelle says she knew God at a young age. “I remember praying a prayer at the age of 7 on the armchair in my mother and father’s room. I remember spiritual feelings of God’s presence in my Christian school at age 9. 

“The desire for approval and love and looking for it in the wrong places all led me to a place of utter despair. By the time I was 14 I was cast out and suicidal. I called out to God one night and remembered that I had one more option — one way out that wasn’t death, so I gave God another try. I joined a youth group. That’s when things got real. Jesus got real. My gran is the reason I am still here. She used to pray a lot and that’s what made a difference in my life.”

Darren became a Christian when he was about 8 or 9 years old. He says: “The Bible just made sense to me. It’s a powerful book and as it says, I am the Word and the Word is Me. So it’s Gods character living in the Word. It’s powerful, just one line, if adopted by the people of the world could solve the world’s problems in an instant. That line? Love your neighbour.”

Darren and Rouchelle have a multigenerational goal. In their many interviews they share that the reason they are pro healthy family structures is that they want to be an inspiration to their grandchildren. This is a couple that is currently parenting children who are under 10 and they are already sharing a multigenerational vision. This is how we are supposed to live. The Bible talks about the God of Abraham; Isaac and Jacob, a multigenerational God. 

Rouchelle sums up their overall message: “This generation has so much potential to choose what they don’t want and to replace it with everlasting stuff. Jesus was right when He said: ‘Give it up and follow me‘.

“To us it was practical, spiritual and beneficial to live like this. The more we stripped away the more we found ourselves as a couple and as a family. We need God. We just need God. Mark 6 verse 8, when Jesus was sending the 12, He said they should take nothing for the journey. It sounds extreme. Jesus was extreme but intentional. 

“I think what we are doing is quite a specific thing. I don’t think it is for everybody but it’s been amazing to go and lean on God’s word. When God says to us: ‘Be nomads’, it was not a foreign concept. Jesus travelled. He travelled without a home. It made things easier. It made it make more sense. Leaning on the Word is a powerful thing.”

Darren and Rouchelle’s life choices to trust God and to follow His leading; their choices to be more intentional about their marriage and family; should inspire us all to do the same. A nomadic lifestyle will not be possible or the purpose for every family. But we should all apsire to a vision that is focused on building a healthy marriage and a family that reflects the heart of God. Godis for families. He is primarily a Father, a present Father and we are called to reflect His love.

Follow their journey on YouTube: www.youtube.com/@Digbyandthelullaby
Connect on Facebook: facebook.com/digbyandthelullaby
Email Darren and Rouchelle Peens at: darrenpeens@gmail.com

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